Many Are Called. Few Succeed. Manchester United: Beyond the Promised Land

Thursday, October 06, 2005

Drive Thru' ATM's

A sign in the Bank Lobby reads: Please note that this Bank is installing new Drive-through teller machines enabling customers to withdraw cash without leaving their vehicles. Customers using this new facility are requested to use the procedures outlined below when accessing their accounts.

After months of careful observation, MALE and FEMALE procedures have been developed based on the majority of customer's habits.

MALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to the cash machine.

2. Put down your car window.

3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN.

4. Enter amount of cash required and withdraw.

5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt.

6. Put window up.

7. Drive off.

FEMALE PROCEDURE:

1. Drive up to cash machine.

2. Reverse and back up the required amount to align car window with the machine.

3. Set parking brake, put the window down.

4. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card.

5. Tell person on cell phone you will call them back and hang up.

6. Attempt to insert card into machine.

7. Open car door to allow easier access to machine due to its excessive distance from the car.

8. Insert card.

9. Re-insert card the right way.

10. Dig through handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page.

11. Enter PIN.

12. Press cancel and re-enter correct PIN.

13. Enter amount of cash required.

14. Check makeup in rear view mirror.

15. Retrieve cash and receipt.

16. Empty handbag again to locate wallet and place cash inside.

17. Write debit amount in check register and place receipt in back of checkbook.

18. Re-check makeup.

19. Drive forward 2 feet.

20. Reverse back to cash machine.

21. Retrieve card.

22. Re-empty handbag, locate cardholder, and place card into the slot provided.

23. Give dirty look to irate male driver waiting behind you.

24. Restart stalled engine and pull off.

25. Redial person on cell phone.

26. Drive for 2 to 3 miles.

27. Release Parking Brake.

Tackled By The Red Devil at 12:33 PM,
0 Fancy Pitting Your Footballing Knowledge Against Mine?

0 Comments:

About This Blog

This.Is.Old.Trafford's First Ever Post

This.Is.Old.Trafford Classics

Cybersex Gone Horribly Wrong (Part 1)

Whale Tails(Part 1)

Whale Tails (Part 2)

The Offside Rule - For Chicks

Whale Tails (Part 3)

What A Man Would Do If He Had A Vagina For 1 Day

If Women Ruled...

Orgasms From Around The World

This.Is.Old.Trafford Archives

2005-09-25
2005-10-02
2005-10-09
2005-10-16
2005-10-23
2005-10-30
2005-11-06
2005-11-13
2005-11-20
2005-11-27
2005-12-04
2005-12-11
2005-12-18
2005-12-25
2006-01-01
2006-01-08
2006-01-15
2006-01-22
2006-02-05
2006-02-19
2006-02-26
2006-03-05
2006-03-12
2006-03-19
2006-03-26
2006-04-02
2006-04-09
2006-04-16
2006-04-23
2006-04-30
2006-05-07
2006-05-14
2006-05-21
2006-05-28
2006-06-04
2006-06-11
2006-06-18
2006-06-25
2006-07-02
2006-07-09
2006-07-16
2006-07-30
2006-08-06
2006-08-13
2006-08-20
2006-08-27
2006-09-03
2006-09-10
2006-09-17
2006-09-24
2006-10-01
2006-10-08
2006-10-15
2006-10-22
2006-10-29
2006-11-05
2006-11-12
2006-11-19
2006-11-26
2006-12-03
2006-12-10
2006-12-17
2006-12-24
2006-12-31
2007-01-21
2007-01-28
2007-02-04
2007-03-04
2007-03-18
2007-04-08
2007-04-15
2007-04-22
2007-04-29
2007-05-06
2007-05-13
2007-10-07

This.Is.Old.Trafford Fanclub

Sarong Party girl

The Red Half of Manchester

This.Is.Old.Trafford Shoutbox

T.I.O.T Offline

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Blog Directory & Search engine

<< # BolehBlogs ? >>